Every failed relationship is painful. The pain of heartbreak can hurt us in a way no physical wound can. When a relationship ends, it’s like a death, and the grief that comes with it can be all-consuming. It’s common to feel angry, sad, and hurt after a break-up, especially if it was a third-party issue. The road to recovery is long and winding, but with the right mindset and tools, it’s possible to move on and start anew.
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Accept What Happened but Don’t Dwell on It
The first step in moving on from a break-up is accepting that it’s over. Don’t try to pick up the pieces because it’ll only hurt you more. Dwelling on the past, overthinking, and analyzing things that have already happened are fruitless activities that only make you feel worse. It’s crucial to choose to accept that it’s over and stop thinking about the “what-ifs” or “what might have beens” in the relationship. A good way to deal with the pain is by journaling about your feelings. Write down all your emotions, fears, and thoughts. Imagine that as you write them down, the bad feelings and thoughts are leaving your body and sticking to the paper.
Let Go
Letting go is the most crucial and difficult phase of every relationship. You’ve invested so much time, money, effort, and tears to make the relationship work out, only to lose it in just a moment. It’s hard to let go, but it’s essential to respect and value yourself more than anyone. Being clingy indicates that your self-value is way below the line. Do not cling to someone who doesn’t see your true value. It’s just not going to work. Clinging to the past will only hold you back from finding true love and happiness.
Go Outside and Be Active
When you’re feeling heartbroken, it’s easy to want to be alone, but don’t isolate yourself for too long. Going out, socializing with friends, and spending time with family can help you think less about your ex. Bask in the sun or go to new places. This will give you a better view of the world you once lived in, the world without your ex. Exercising, getting sunlight, and fresh air will help you become healthier, which will make your body feel good. Soon enough, your heart will start feeling better too.
Don’t Look Back or Imagine “What If . . .”
Once a relationship is broken, it’ll never be the same again, no matter how hard you try to piece it back together. There’s a reason why the relationship didn’t work, and it’s rare that the relationship works the second time around. If you broke up because of individual differences or cheating, think twice before getting involved with the same person again. It’s important to look within yourself and be honest. If you think you can still trust the person wholeheartedly, then go for it. But you have to be careful.
Make New Memories
One of the best things you can do is to create new memories. If you visited some places together in the past, go to a new spot that you’ve never been before. Try new foods and activities, like bungee jumping or ziplining. If you create new memories, you’ll have a better chance at forgetting your ex, and you’ll discover many more things that you’re capable of.
Improve Yourself
Being single is the perfect time to focus on yourself. Treat yourself to a spa day or a new outfit. Take a class to learn something new, like cooking or yoga. As you improve yourself, you’ll build the self-confidence that was marred by your previous relationship. This confidence makes you feel good about yourself, and that’s very attractive.
Avoid Contact With Your Ex as Much as Possible
Your ex might still want to contact you even after the breakup. If this happens, it will certainly make it harder for you to forget him. Be respectful but mindful of your needs. You can change your number (or block his) and delete his number from your contact list. Unfollow him or block him on all your social media accounts, and delete all your old messages and emails so you don’t spend any time going through them.
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Make Lifestyle Changes
Make a list of all the things you want to do with your life. Did your ex hate boating because he got seasick? Go on a cruise. Did he always roll his eyes when you wanted to go dancing? Take a dance class! Clean your room and throw away all the things that you associate with your ex, like photo albums, gifts he gave you, old flowers, letters, and birthday cards. Removing these things as a memento of your previous relationship will help you forget him faster and for good.
See the Good in Yourself
Make a list of all the bad qualities of your ex, the things you couldn’t stand about him or her. List all the reasons why you shouldn’t get back together. Then enumerate all of your good qualities, those qualities that make you special and worth a second shot in love. Having these things written down will help you convince yourself that you’ve made the right decision.
Love Again
Try not to close your heart to a new possibility of a love that is better, bolder, and greater than the previous one. Smile and be hopeful. There is someone who is right for you, someone who will be thankful to have you, someone who will treasure and respect you more than anyone else.
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Conclusion
Breaking up is hard, but it’s not the end of the world. By following these tips, you can get over your ex and move on with your life. Remember, there is someone out there waiting for you who will find you no matter what. Be thankful, learn from your past, and use that to become a better and more lovable person.